I am away from my computer at this time.
So I was web-surfing tonight & realized that I have about 180 AIM away messages saved under my screen-name at home. This is utterly the most pathetic day of my meaningless existance...
I must have led such a lonely life in highschool in order to WRITE 180 away messages...
AND FURTHERMORE?
I am on my third year of college and have enough spare time to READ all 180 my away messages from highschool.
Here are some examples:
easter brings about eating disorders....
and no, they do not involve throwing up or starving.
Smile it makes a world of difference. Dance who knows when you won't be able to. Live because life is everything...AND DAMNIT HAVE SWEETDREAMS:-D
sun tanning, off to the strawberry farm, then fishing for a wall-mounter (:
CDavis60: i sent the check, my divorce laywer mailed it
smileygurl8830: uh huh...you spin a might fine yarn of lies
CDavis60: well you spin a trail of deception
smileygurl8830: yell you leave a trail of urine...you fat cow
CDavis60: and you leave a trail of shitt falling out your ass
smileygurl8830: haha, ok whatever homo
CDavis60: Dike
smileygurl8830: FAGGOT
I blame AIM for my social malfunctions and my rare form of "Automotive Resperatory Diamysis"...I also blame them for chronic hunger in Siam & the liver spots on the aged.
The end.
What I've learned today in life, love, and politics:
Life: Steven Orr Spurrier is a magician.
Love: Rhymes with Fluve---if you pronounce it right.
Politics: I don't remember loaning China billions of dollars.
~all done in good humor
Saturday, October 11, 2008
Monday, October 6, 2008
Surprise!
Man--I suck at blogging.
In case anyone was wondering, I did not die recently; ergo that was not the reason for my absence in "blogger" world. Lots of non-cyber related porn...took my mind off of the important things in life.
So I have been contemplating about writing for my university's newspaper. Something along the lines of sitting in a "secret" spot, watching the kids go by, and making fun of them with my sharp wit and binoculars. There is so much potential here for bitchy comments via moi--like the other day, I saw this big-un' with her hair extensions the same color as her bright purple shirt and shoes! Since when did Barney start advertising on college campuses?---I'd really like a job.
Oh, and how about the cattle that keep parading in plaid mini-shorts around school?! I do not want to see your cellulite, uterus, or branded butt cheeks on my way to psych. of religion. Literally, these girls look like their shorts are about to be eaten away by the munching of their famished asses---to put it in layman's terms. Obviously they don't realize that guys don't go for that bull...especially when there are people like me walking around.
And don't think that boys escape my scrutiny. I was talking with a friend recently about how guys are becoming so much more metro-sexual on campus. Funny since this is south carolina and this is south carolina---there are no "metros", there are no equal rights, 5 girls in an apartment is considered a brothel. Why the hell do I have to share my skinny jeans, sunglasses, hair styles and makeup with all the guys in the world? So what if we stole your multi-bladed razors, boxer-briefs, and pants! You pratically handed them to us! But my feminity?! You can't have it, "metro-boy," so give it back.
What I've learned today in life, love, and politics:
Life: Is funnier when viewed upside down, drunk, and shirtless.
Love: PLUMP WHEN YOU COOK THEM!
Politics: Palin= knocked up teen
Mrs. Spears= knocked up Jamie-Lynn
The question is who will shave their head next?
~all done in good humor
In case anyone was wondering, I did not die recently; ergo that was not the reason for my absence in "blogger" world. Lots of non-cyber related porn...took my mind off of the important things in life.
So I have been contemplating about writing for my university's newspaper. Something along the lines of sitting in a "secret" spot, watching the kids go by, and making fun of them with my sharp wit and binoculars. There is so much potential here for bitchy comments via moi--like the other day, I saw this big-un' with her hair extensions the same color as her bright purple shirt and shoes! Since when did Barney start advertising on college campuses?---I'd really like a job.
Oh, and how about the cattle that keep parading in plaid mini-shorts around school?! I do not want to see your cellulite, uterus, or branded butt cheeks on my way to psych. of religion. Literally, these girls look like their shorts are about to be eaten away by the munching of their famished asses---to put it in layman's terms. Obviously they don't realize that guys don't go for that bull...especially when there are people like me walking around.
And don't think that boys escape my scrutiny. I was talking with a friend recently about how guys are becoming so much more metro-sexual on campus. Funny since this is south carolina and this is south carolina---there are no "metros", there are no equal rights, 5 girls in an apartment is considered a brothel. Why the hell do I have to share my skinny jeans, sunglasses, hair styles and makeup with all the guys in the world? So what if we stole your multi-bladed razors, boxer-briefs, and pants! You pratically handed them to us! But my feminity?! You can't have it, "metro-boy," so give it back.
What I've learned today in life, love, and politics:
Life: Is funnier when viewed upside down, drunk, and shirtless.
Love: PLUMP WHEN YOU COOK THEM!
Politics: Palin= knocked up teen
Mrs. Spears= knocked up Jamie-Lynn
The question is who will shave their head next?
~all done in good humor
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