24 > 13

L: lie
O: optimism
V: venereal disease
E: extra credit

My grandad lent me a book by Glenn Beck titled, "Real Solutions to the World's Biggest Problems: An Inconvenient Book". Beck narrowmindedly conceives approaches to handling hot-
national-topics while giving the book the name "World's Biggest Problems..."

I wasn't aware, Glenn, that there was a Mexican Boarder Problem in Russia; and to think we've been hogging all the barbed-wire.





But then it hit me!





According to Beck, some of the World's Biggest Problems include:

Blind Dating
Remembering Names
Tips/Gratuities



I must say that had I not read this book, these problems wouldn't have even crossed my mind as internationally unavoidable inconveniences! But take a look again---they MUST.

With so many international food chains (aka Outback, Kyotos, Applebees) getting rid of their free appetizer bread (ESPECIALLY in Africa) it is no wonder that tip jars have been replaced by malnutrition.

In China you have like a BILLION people all living within 20 minutes of each other, and half of them have either the same name or one that rhymes with it. Of COURSE this is a memory tag for the name-recollection impared.

The growing number of --dumb people-- has led to the universal use of AIM as a blind-date facility. Cyber your what?

In any case, Beck has now become my new hero and will hopefully be coming up with a #2. If all the presidential candidates were like Glenn, then perhaps the world would be a little less confusing. What I've learned today in life, love, and politics:
Life: Do NOT let people you don't know get you down.
Love: Do NOT let STD's escape your definition of love. More lovers than not have one.
Politics: I'm sorry that Glenn Beck didn't write a chapter on math; perhaps Obama's 24 primary wins would have made more sense to Hillary if she knew that that was bigger than 13.

--all done in good humor